I am often asked what the most important trait is for a coach.  While there are many correct answers to this, one standout trait in our (UAFS) culture is empathy, and here is why:

In Ryan Holiday's latest book, Courage is Calling, he poses the question, "What is the opposite of courage?"  He answers the question by stating that it is not the obvious "cowardice," but instead, "apathy."  So what is the opposite of apathy? It is, of course, empathy.   

Empathy is not just knowing how someone feels about or in a certain situation; it is actually feeling how someone feels.  It is hard.  It is exhausting.  It is hurtful.  It is necessary.  You cannot have life-change without having life-connection.

From where does empathy come?  It comes from love, humility, strength, and service of the leader. 

That is our daily challenge, our so called cross to bear.  To learn empathy, it must be demonstrated and modeled. 

·         How can you not show love if you have been loved?

·         How can you not be humble if you have experienced humility?

·         How can you not be strong if you have been in a strong embrace?

·         How can you not be called to service if you have been served?

Empathy consumes time.  It is messy, and it is an investment that pays dividends beyond what we may ever see.  To be empathetic is to be courageous.  Why would anyone want to feel the hardships, troubles, pain, depression and anxiety of others? Because we love them, we are in service to them.  Because it is the only way we truly feel their success, their victories, their love and their growth.